Some common reasons why people may self-harm or self-injure are:

• coping with overwhelming emotional distress
• coping with difficult feelings and intrusive thoughts
• not knowing what else to do to alleviate the distress they are feeling
• feeling on one’s own with their distress
• to get the feeling of having some control in your life

Overwhelming emotional distress

A very common reason for self-harm, self-injury is coping with overwhelming emotional pain related to social problems (the here and now of our everyday life), or trauma (past events or things that happened to us), or perhaps future based concerns.

Social problems:

• having difficulties at work or school, particularly when we feel disempowered or unimportant
• being bullied, harassed, manipulated or controlled in some way
• difficult relationships with friends or family which result in us feeling unacknowledged, dismissed or isolated
• coping coming to terms with sexuality
• when we see ourselves as less than other people, and make comparisons which make us feel negatively towards ourselves
• coping with the expectations of others upon you

Trauma:

Trauma is the emotional response to the experience of a terrible incident which can result in feeling helpless, really scared, vulnerable, in emotional pain and alone. At the far end of the scale; traumatic experiences can involve a threat to a person’s safety or even their life, however, any event that leaves you feeling overwhelmed and on your own can be traumatic. The exact details of the event doesn’t determine whether it is traumatic or not. As humans we have subjective emotional experiences. This means that what may be traumatic for one person, may not be for another. The more frightened and helpless one feels, the more likely they are to be traumatized.  

Contact me – I am here to explore with you your relationship to the behaviour of self-harm, self-injury. My belief is “that its anti-thesis is supporting one’s self through self-awareness, self-acceptance and self-empowerment. This can involve identifying reliable others who can support you too. Too often we bring our empty buckets to wells that are familiar, but unfortunately leave us thirsty for the things we yearn. With my support you can identify the obstacles to you meeting for yourself, and receiving from others the unmet needs which make self-harm/injuring a necessary go to.